In Sales training programmes, sales negotiation skills are often missed altogether. You could say that the reason most of us feel the need to negotiate with anyone else is so that we can find a way to get what we want. Being human, most of us believe that our viewpoint is important and that everyone else should at least think about seeing things our way. If you had no wants or requirements, there would be little reason for you to negotiate with anyone.

If sales courses don't always teach influencing skills, how then can you convince other people to favourably consider your propositions?

Believe it or not, there is a science backed up by more than 60 years of research that has evolved our knowledge of the use of influence to satisfy our needs and wants in sales negotiation. The world's foremost expert on the science of persuasion, Dr Robert Cialdini, has identified 6 principles of persuasive communications in his research:

Reciprocation
Liking
Commitment & Consistency
Authority
Scarcity
Social Proof

Whilst persuasion will always be somewhat of an art, it is really helpful to deploy the power of the 6 principles identified by scientific research to increase your odds of convincing others to give you what you really want.

Let's start by looking at what I believe to be the most important principle from a negotiation viewpoint - reciprocation.

Reciprocation means that we return to others the same behaviour that they exhibit towards us. If you have done me a favour, then I should help you. If you invite me to your birthday party, then I should invite you to my birthday party. If you make a concession to me, then I should make a concession to you.

So what does this mean to you and how can you employ it to get what you need?

Here's how:

Make sure that when you start a negotiation you ask for a little more than you would be happy to receive.

Let's say you are selling a widget and you need to obtain $ 100 for the widget.

If you would like to deploy the principle of reciprocation, then you should start by requesting a little more - let's say by asking for $ 105.

If your counterparty does not agree to handing over $ 105 for the widget, then you are able to make a concession by lowering your price to $ 100 in exchange for your counterparty also making a concession to you. A concession that your counterparty could make in this case could be to pay you cash on the spot or to take care of shipping etc.

The key is for you to offer the concession - don't wait for your counterparty to make a concession. Just make sure that you use the word 'if' when you make your concession:

"If you are prepared to pay me in cash right now, then I could reduce the price from $ 105 to $ 100". This way you give an indication to your counterparty that you are willing to be flexible and you will now significantly increase the likeliness of them also being flexible and offering a concession in return.

Just be sure to use this principle 'in the moment' whilst you are negotiating. If you walked away from a negotiation to review your proposal, your counterparty will be more likely to regard your revised offer as a new proposal, not as a concession.

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